Sunday Scribblings

This week's post prompt on Sunday Scribblings is about "Present."

I've actually written about being present in the moment several times in my journaling. It is something that I constantly struggle to do. I'm addicted to list making & sometimes this gets me in the mind set that I'm constantly thinking about the future. This can be an issue when it comes to living in the moment since I'm already way ahead of myself.

I read recently in one my devotions that God tends to give us visions of what are meant to do. These visions can come in a dream or just in a fleeting thought throughout the day. What is most important is that we accept these visions for what they are and cherish them. It doesn't mean that we should sit back and do nothing with the information, but that we need to consider that there was a reason that this information came to us.

Being in the present is a goal for myself on a daily basis. Not only does this allow me to enjoy my life more, but it also gives me an opportunity to experiences the messages that God is gifting to me throughout the day.

Sunday Scribblings - Plan B

This week's prompt on Sunday Scribblings is "Plan B - Sometimes the best laid plans don't work out. What do you do then? Move to Plan B."

I'd like to say that my being such a fanatical list maker helps me never have to go to Plan B. However, life doesn't work that way. I've struggled in the past with my plans not working out the way I want them too. In the past couple of years, this has caused a lot of unnecessary stress and pain to my life. You all know the saying - when life gives you lemons you make lemonade.

Recently, I've come to the conclusion that my extensive planning and looking to the future isn't really the best way to live my life. Yes, it added structure and consistency to my daily existence when I needed it most. As a single parent, you need to have something to fall back on. My planning was there for me. I'm sure my family thought I was beyond crazy!

I'll never be that person who lives each moment as it comes. I'll always want to try to predict the outcome of something so I can plan for what I can do to get through it. However, I quickly learned this past year that I can't predict everything. There will be moments when Plans B, C, D & even Z have to come into play. When things don't go the way I wanted them to, I can't stop living.

Some people have mottos that they live by. I've had to change my motto to be something that is more conducive to living my life more effectively in times of uncertainty. I haven't fine tuned it yet, but it would be something like this "Hey, $%@# happens! Plan B is where it's at." As you can see, it needs more adjectives...

Regrets

I'm sure that we have all lived through this at one time. You say something to someone you care about and regret it later. Maybe you told them the truth about something that hurt them. Or possibly you brought up something from the past that was painful to relive. Or maybe you even called them a hurtful name. The regret after that happens can be pretty overwhelming.

I heard one time that we tend to hurt the people we love the most because we believe they will always be there for us no matter what. We trust that these people will forgive us, so we don't have to be on our best behavior. Our guard can be down and sometimes we say things that we don't really think through.

I have had some of those moments lately with my son. They are moments that I relive over and over again in my mind. What could I have done differently? How could I have reacted in a calmer manner? Will what I said to him hurt him forever? What if he doesn't forgive me?

I'm learning that I can't continue to beat myself up because of these moments. I need to use them as learning opportunities. I must apologize for what I said, but not rehash it over and over again with him or even in my mind. I must move forward in our relationship and recognize that mistakes will happen.

It is a constant battle for me and something that I truly struggle with. The most important thing for me to always remember is that our lives are short. Living for the here and now is what I should strive for. And, reminding myself that it is ok to mess up every once in awhile, as long as I don't make the same mistake again.

Sunday Scribblings - Easy

The blog prompt on Sunday Scribblings is "easy." Sure not a simple prompt - that's for sure!

When I think of easy, I think of something that is a habit. Those routines in life that we can do without even thinking. We all have certain activities that we do on a daily basis without any prompting or notification on a list. The problem is that we can become too comfortable living in that easy environment. I often say that I'm not learning if I'm not uncomfortable. However, that takes true effort. It is much more simple for me to resort to the habits and daily functions instead of step outside my comfort zone. I have several things on my vision board that I truly desire to come true. I also know that these things will never come true if I keep taking the easy path. I heard one time that it take 3 months to make a new habit. Three months is a LONG time! I have to start on that path, though, to make sure that my visions become an easy part of my life. Then I can move onto the next vision for myself.

Values

We all value different things. It's what makes us most unique in who we are. You can never argue with someone about their values, even if their values are different than yours. That's what makes them so special. Here are the things that I value the most.

1. I've been blessed with a very close, loving, crazy family. I wouldn't change that for the world.
2. As an introvert who has to be on display often at work, I very much crave quiet when I get home.
3. Through communication from others, I want to know everything about everything that is going on or I feel left out of something.
4. A great sense of humor in a coworker is critical to helping me get through the day.
5. Finding myself in uncomfortable situations where I know that my just experiencing it is allowing me to grow as a person. Although, I don't go looking for these situations just to experience that!
6. Learning about new and exciting things, or even just boring things. I literally live to learn.
7. I value my house, or rather my home. It takes a lot of hard work to have this in my life and I love that I made it to this point in my life to have it.
8. My freedom as an American is cherished and I love that I can express my opinions through voting. And, that my voice is heard when I contact my legislators. I know that my opinion isn't always right or accepted, but the freedom to express is so important to me!
9. My ability to recognize when I need more than what I can give myself. While I don't always ask or accept the help, I value that I am to that point when I don't shy away from the recognition of needing something else to step in.
10.  I value my ability to write and what that has given me in a career and in my education. I'm not the best writer, or the most creative, but it is something I enjoy and that makes me happy.

Favorite Room

I absolutely love my house. Now, just to clarify, there are things I definitely want to change about my house. And, if given a windfall of money, I'd probably move. But, the fact that the house is mine means so very much to me!

I was recently thinking about what might be my favorite spot in my house. I have several, but there is one that I always go to when I need to unwind or think or just step away from life. It is my front living room. I say front living room because I also have a back living room, or family room. And, I never know what to call each room!

My front living room does have a bit of an identity crisis. During the holidays, it actually serves as a dining room. Every other time of the year, it has a comfy love seat, a comfy chair & my dining room table (without the extensions that go in it during the holidays). It also has a big window looking out to the world. The one thing it doesn't have is a TV.

This room was the first room that I truly spent time decorating. I painted it, but stuff on the walls & hung some beautiful sheer drapes. I also bought furniture especially for this room. Of course, the love seat & chair get moved during the holidays, but still they were bought specific for that space.

I find that when I go into that room, I instantly take a deep breath. I sit on the love seat and stare out the window. And, my puppy comes and cuddles with me. It's quiet and serene. There are no interruptions.

My favorite time to sit in that room is when the snow is falling. I can lose myself in the peace fullness of watching the flakes fall through the big window.

I think everyone needs a favorite room in their house or trailer or apartment. We all need a place that makes us feel safe and happy. I am thankful for my front living room...or whatever you want to call it!

Sunday Scribblings - Sensation

Ok, I know it isn't Sunday, but I found this neat new blog that I want to start using as inspiration. Sunday Scribbling offers up a weekly topic to post on. This past week, the topic was sensation.

I think that our country sensationalizes people for the wrong things. For example, Charlie Sheen. That man may have many talents; however, everyone now knows him most for his "tiger blood" and "winning" rampages.

I looked up the definition of sensationalize and was a bit surprised.

1. use of shocking material: the practice of emphasizing the most lurid, shocking, and emotive aspects of something under discussion or investigation, especially by the media
2. theory of knowledge: the belief that all knowledge is obtained only through the senses

I guess I should not be spouting off then about sensationalizing people for the wrong thing. I've been "schooled." Clearly it was appropriate to sensationalize Charlie Sheen. While it would not be appropriate to sensationalize someone from the military signing back up for more time even after they have served.

Maybe we should come up with a different word that will put a more positive spin on what our media puts out there. Instead of sensationlize, we should sensationositive. Definition: To portray the positive nature of human kind through meaningful media production.

Of course, please keep in mind that I'm obsessed with watching shows like 16 & Pregnant, so I truly have nothing more to say. Winning!!