Regrets

I'm sure that we have all lived through this at one time. You say something to someone you care about and regret it later. Maybe you told them the truth about something that hurt them. Or possibly you brought up something from the past that was painful to relive. Or maybe you even called them a hurtful name. The regret after that happens can be pretty overwhelming.

I heard one time that we tend to hurt the people we love the most because we believe they will always be there for us no matter what. We trust that these people will forgive us, so we don't have to be on our best behavior. Our guard can be down and sometimes we say things that we don't really think through.

I have had some of those moments lately with my son. They are moments that I relive over and over again in my mind. What could I have done differently? How could I have reacted in a calmer manner? Will what I said to him hurt him forever? What if he doesn't forgive me?

I'm learning that I can't continue to beat myself up because of these moments. I need to use them as learning opportunities. I must apologize for what I said, but not rehash it over and over again with him or even in my mind. I must move forward in our relationship and recognize that mistakes will happen.

It is a constant battle for me and something that I truly struggle with. The most important thing for me to always remember is that our lives are short. Living for the here and now is what I should strive for. And, reminding myself that it is ok to mess up every once in awhile, as long as I don't make the same mistake again.