Monday

Caleb served his OSS today. I’m not sure how to put this into concrete words, but it was pretty traumatic for me. It started off with my call to the OSS coordinator to let him know that Caleb would be late because of his doctor’s appointment. This had already been approved through the Lincoln assistant principal, so my call was just a courtesy. The teacher I spoke with was very accusatory toward me and denied any prior notice from Lincoln on this happening. I understand that this teacher probably spends his entire day listening to kids and parents provide lame excuses for why they should not participate, but I ended the call feeling very belittled and that he felt I was not a good parent. Thankfully, when I called Lincoln and spoke to one of the secretaries, she assured me that she would be able to provide him with the documentation he needed and that it really wasn’t a big deal at all.

Caleb was extremely nervous about the entire thing, so when I dropped him off at 10 am, I think we were both pretty worked up. So, that set the mood for the day for me. I had to pick him up at 2:30pm, so I got there a little bit early to make sure I could find a parking place. Most of the kids that came flooding out of the school were the kind of kids that I hope Caleb never hangs out with. Now, I know that sounds very bad for me to say. I know that a lot of these kids are going to this school as a last resort to get a good education. Most of them have even chosen to go here because they had a goal for themselves. However, the kids that surrounded the area that I was parked appeared to be pretty hard core. All of them were smoking and many of them were dressed like gang members. It just made me sad because this wasn’t in my dreams for Caleb.

Isn’t it funny that our dreams for our children are not necessarily based on their personality? I can imagine that my dreams for Caleb were first developed when he was just an infant. How could I have known then what he would turn out to be like? While my dreams for him are not specific, they do entail getting a good education and going on to post secondary education whatever that may mean. And, I always dreamed that he would be nice and caring to everyone he comes into contact with. I believe he is that kind of young man. And, this is why I think I was so impacted by what I saw today at that school. Caleb was surrounded by kids that didn’t get the love and attention that he has, didn’t get the support and understanding that he gets, didn’t have a safe environment to come home to that he has, or didn’t get the chance to have dreams made about where they would be that he has. So, I think that is why it made me sad. It gave me a glimpse into a world where a different Caleb might have been if he didn’t have the family he has. I’m tearing up just thinking about it. Do our kids ever know how much we strive to give them in life?

Quick update on his arm: They removed the 12 stitches this morning and said that everything looks great. He has to wear the steri-strips (no clue how to spell that!) for about a week, but no over bandages. He can get it wet & use it as often as he wants. The PA talked to us about having Caleb give his arm a really good work out because it is quite a bit smaller than the other arm. He recommended Caleb not holding back on any activities. We get to go back in about a month to have a final xray & then we should be finished. Let’s all hope this is Caleb’s last accident ever!

Positives for today

1. Having the opportunity to recognize that even though I am a single parent, I have still been able to give Caleb a lot of love.
2. I wrote my first community action plan for a grant I am working on. Had no idea what should be in it, so it took me 4 hours to write 3 pages!
3. No snow – yet…